For the past year, I told myself I wouldn’t do this: I wouldn’t write another blog post commemorating the amount of time I’ve been home from my mission.

But how can I not? How can I go throughout my day and not really reflect on the day I left Utah, Granger, speaking Spanish every day, immersing myself in the gospel?

Truth be told, it was somewhat easy. How did I spend my day today? I worked 7.5 hours at my job as a co-lead student [it was a slower Friday than normal] and attended one college class – Senior Writing Seminar, the capstone of my English degree.

It’s odd to look back at that girl who came home. I miss Hermana Beckert. I miss being a missionary.

If someone had told me two years ago how great life is after the mission, I wouldn’t have believed him. I came home broken, angry, confused, and scared about the future. I didn’t see any possible way that I would be able to move on and heal from the anger that festered in my heart for so long.

That journey was long. It took 19 months after coming home before I was able to let go of the bulk of my hatred. But I did it. I conquered.

Overcoming. Conquering. Improving. Within the last year, those are the things that I’ve done. I’ve stretched and grown in so many ways. I doubt when I was released that many missionaries I knew saw me as a future Relief Society President. But I did it.

Yes, I miss Hermana Beckert and I miss being a missionary. I will always miss being a full-time missionary and I have every intention of serving as many missions as possible.

But the ache isn’t nearly as strong as it used to be because I know how to be a member missionary. Doors to life that I never saw before are before me. Over the past two years, I’ve been amazed at the opportunities and blessings that have come my way.

Yes, I’ve come far in two years. I’ve come further in the past year alone.

I can’t wait to see where I’ll be in 2017.