Good golly, is 2014 really wrapping up? I remember ringing it in – well, okay, not exactly. I was a missionary at the time 2014 began, so I was probably asleep when the clock slipped from 2013 to 2014. But still, what a year.

Let’s take a look at all the memorable things that happened.

Return with Honor
In April of this year I returned home from my mission. The one dream I’d been working away at for 9 years finally came to a close. For a little while I wasn’t sure how to function. Thankfully I snapped out of that and realized, while missions are great and wonderful, they’re not meant to be the best years of your life. Peaking at the age of 20 is, quite honestly, pathetic. You have a whole life ahead of you to live with even grander adventures waiting for you.

In all honesty, I can’t say I enjoyed every single moment of my mission. I struggled with that when I came home. I thought that, because I couldn’t honestly say I loved every minute of my mission, I was a bad person and missionary. Over the months, though, I’ve realized that’s not the case. My mission was my biggest blessing, but it was also my biggest trial. I didn’t have a crisis of testimony, but I had a crisis of faith in humanity.

Looking back, I can say with confidence that the Lord is pleased with my service. No, I didn’t have a lot of baptisms and reactivations. I was never a leader, I was never one of the “popular” missionaries, and I doubt I’m remembered in any of those wards and branch I served in. But does all of that recognition really matter?

It’s taken me almost 8 months to realize it doesn’t. Perhaps I wasn’t an Ammon out in the field. But I was an Hermana Beckert. I worked my butt off. I wasn’t a perfect missionary or companion. But I tried my hardest. Perhaps most of my leaders thought they didn’t see that. Perhaps they were frustrated that they couldn’t see the “fruits” of my labors with their own eyes. But I know I did everything I knew how to do for my areas in my power. And that’s good enough, because a mission is between you and the Lord anyway.

Forgiveness is something that my mission opened my eyes to. I came home very bitter towards several people from my mission. I thought I’d forgiven them while still in the field, but when I did some inner reflection when I came home I realized I hadn’t. I realized I’m slow to forgive. That’s not a bad thing, as long as I’m actively working on forgiving.

There were a lot of spiritual things I learned on my mission, but I learned a ton of things about myself and about how to deal with other people. I learned to stand up for myself. I learned that you need to raise your voice if you don’t agree with something or if you have problems, but you have to do it in a respectful manner. I learned that when Christ said we need to love everyone, He didn’t mean we have to like everyone, and I learned that forgiving someone doesn’t mean you have to be their friend or even talk to them ever again.

Probably the most important lesson I came away with is that you have to be comfortable with who you are and with your standing with the Lord. If you have confidence in both areas, it doesn’t matter what other people say.

The Return to Rexburg
After spending 4.5 months in the Armpit of America after my mission, I headed back to good ol’ Rexburg to continue my education. I was terrified before school began. I had this feeling of impending doom, that something was going to happen during the semester.

Happen it did. This semester was rough with German class and then a pretty big snag with my GI Bill paperwork. Eventually things did smooth over and everything was okay. I came out of GER 201 with an A!

I was blessed with amazing roommates, a good friend from the mission who was willing to give me a blessing when I was freaking out, a job with a great coworker, and lots of family support and love.

This semester taught me a lot about faith. It taught me that when we believe things will work out and we work hard to make them happen, blessings come. It also taught me that sometimes we have to take a plunge into the unknown. At the beginning of the semester I saw applications for the English Study Abroad to Ireland and England in 2015. Almost immediately a voice told me, “Do it.” I had no idea how I’d pay for it. I jumped in head first. But the prompting was so strong that I couldn’t not do it. And the payments have been working out!

I’ve learned to make time for the temple. I’ve learned to make time for morning scripture study. I’ve learned how to manage money better than before my mission.

Those are really the biggest things that happened this year. But that’s okay. After the 18 months I spent out in the field, I’m glad 2014 was relatively quiet. I made a lot of personal progress.

I have a very good feeling about 2015. I’m excited for the adventures that are waiting.

I’m excited for this new beginning. 🙂